Yesterday night, my friend lost her granny. I did not know that and I wished her good night as usual. She replied me back with good night message but did not tell me about the terrible loss occurred to her. Why, because she did not want to share her sorrow? Why, because she did not want to disturb my beauty sleep? Whatever may be the reason, she chose to keep her sorrow to herself only.
“Sharing the joy doubles it and sharing the sorrow reduces it to half”.
I was in the really good mood today, had a good cup of tea on a tea stall outside my office premises. I was chatting to my colleagues and sharing some chocolates. We were talking about going to new movie “avatar” and I was waiting for her to plan the movie. Here she came but in the really bad mood. I waved my hand to say hello but she did not reply. I realized something really bad must have happened to her.
I pinged and wished her good morning, suddenly she asked me to come to her place. Then she told me about her terrible loss. Yesterday night at 10 pm, she got the news about her granny’s death. Yesterday only, we were talking about her, discussing the problems of old age. I searched a article for the reasons of old age (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Telomere) and about to share it with her but it did not happen.
“Zindagi kaisi hai pagheli hi; kabhi yeh hasaye, kabhi yeh rulaye”
I did not have the words to console her. I was standing there like a dumb and staring her swollen eyes. It was pretty clear that she did not sleep yesterday. We chatted and suddenly she started crying. I wished I could give her a hug and say any soothing words if any can reduce her sorrow. None were there in my mind and no words can reduce the pain and loss she felt.
She has not been meeting her granny since last two years but it did not matter too much as she is really close to her.
“You can kiss your family and friends good-bye and put miles between you, but at the same time you carry them with you in your heart, your mind, your stomach, because you do not just live in a world but a world lives in you.”
She bought a saari to gift her whenever she would visit but that day did not come. I had the same kind of experience with my grandma also. She was wishing to see me during her last time but I was preparing for my semester exams. I never realized that she could die too and she is mere mortal. I cried for the first time in my life. I guess, I cried not because I lost my grandma but because I was not able to meet her during her last time and when she was wishing it too. I was felling the loss because I was not able to fulfill her last wish. I saw my father too crying for the first time in my life and I guess last time also. It was a terrible loss in the form of a death which cannot be undone.
The feeling of loss is inevitable after the death of near and dear one but should we really need to lost in that feeling knowing the truth,
“nainum chindanti shastrani
nainum dahati pavaka
na chainam kledayanty-apo
na soshayati maruta” (Gita: Chapter II verse 23)
Which mean, “Weapons cannot cut the soul, not it can be burned by fire, nor water can moisten it, nor mind can make it dry”.
It is the body which has been given the rest from this long suffering journey called life. Death starts chasing us since the time we born on this mortal world. Most of us identify ourselves with this body of ours. We see this body of ours in the mirror & feel that this is our real self. However, this delusion of ours goes momentarily, when we see someone dead. Then we think, shall we too be dead like him one day or shall we live after leaving this body too? If you are a non-believer then you may think yourself to be dead but if you believe in God & religion then you may think otherwise.
“dehi nityam avadhyo-ayam
dehe sarvasy bharat
tasmat sarvani bhutani
na tvam shochitum-arhasi” (Gita: Chapter II verse 30)
"O descendant of Bharata, this soul residing in the bodies of all can never be slain. Therefore you should not grieve for any living being."
A great writer of Hindi literature has written these words in his story, “Why do I need to cry for the death of my son!!! When a small child weeps, he knows that his mother will pacify him by giving him sweets. He was crying for the things which he knows he can get. If he would have known to the fact even after crying with full throat, he will not get any sweet; he might not have cried. Similarly, when I know that I will never get my son back from eternity, then why should I cry?”
"When a person gives up all the desires in his waking mind and when his self is turned inward and satisfied within itself, at that time he is said to be a sthithapragna (one who is stabilized in awareness)."
(Gita: Chapter II verse 55)
Her granny must have attained the same state and thus have met with the death with open heart and hands like we met a old forgotten friend. Let her soul be rested in peace and may god provide the support to get the nirvana.
“God Bless Her.”
